funny poker stories
No good games on Stars right now, so I'm just surfing around and found back to back stories that had me laughing...
On 2+2, someone posted a dream he had...
"I was playing live poker at the casino. My first hand it gets raised and I fold, heads up to the flop. By the turn board reads Q982, and the two players are allin. The first player flips 10 J for nut straight. Second player says "I'm a favorite" and flips Q 9 and a piece of bread with peanut butter and jelly spread across it. The river is another piece of bread, completing his draw to the peanut butter and jelly sandwich."
On the wpdg e-mail list a story from a live game...
"I'm on the button & limp with As2s after limpers.
322 (rb) unraised pot.
3 deep stacks at the table.
Deep stack 1 (A bit Muppety. Looks and acts like a young Samuel L.
Jackson) makes a nice sized bet.
Deep stack 2 (Total maniac. Uses a device he holds to his throat to
talk. Talks a lot. Comes across surprisingly loud and sounds a bit like
a robot - nothing wrong with this - just giving information).
C-3PO makes a big raise.
I stop to think If I'm against 33's Full.
Oh, yea, I'm the Third Big Stack and have the table covered.
I go with my gut and Stack-Off.
Samuel L Jackson Insta-Calls.
C-3PO goes into the Tank. He's in the Tank for a long time & then says,
"I call".
Mr Jackson has a married pair of Kings (overpair - forgot to raise from
the BB pre-flop).
C3PO has A7o, No Hand-No Draw.
The Hojo's hand hold's up.
***********************************
While they are pushing me the pot, Samuel L says to me, "That's right.
You OUTDREW me MOTHER FU$&*R!
I say, "PLEASE DON'T hate the Hojo. Hate the Game, Sir".
Samuel L - "What the Fu$k did you just say?"
Hojo - "Don't Hate the Hojo, Hate the GAME!"
"I don't even know what the Fu$k a Mother Fuc$!ng "Hojo" is! I just know
You-One LUCKY Mother Fuc$#r,...........Mother Fuc$#r!".
He sits down and calms down. As he is sitting down, C-3PO stands up and
starts yelling (into his electronic throat device that sounds like
something from Star Wars meets Lost in Space on Star Trek)......
"I-Hate-the-Hojo-I-Hate-the-Hojo-I Hate-the-Hojo."
People are looking from other tables.
I never felt so uneasy stacking chips. Another day in Paradise. YMMV.
Best Wishes
The Hojo" |
